Those pokey-brained punters meeting at Canehenge got a mega warning yesterday, as uniform-clad Maria showed them how to treat disgusting wounds.

Real?
Maria reeled in the reeling crowd by really giving all she's got.  Some said the blood wasn't real, though. Some audience members participated by rolling over on the grass and groaning.  One father gently bellowed, "It's a bit of a chuckle but the message is serious."

All eyeballs were on Maria as she sailed through the details of how her father had been daintily struck on the head by a falling garage door.  The naughty door was removed but the head needed emergency treatment.  Maria aimed a digit at the telephone and brought ambulance men driving fast up the road.  A spokesman from St Johns Ambulance may have said he wanted to touch the hem of Maria's garment, but that was not okay so he gave her

a trusty Bravery Award instead.  Tickled locals exclaimed that no one else in the Kent region had got one of those shiny medals.

Lost and Found

Later in the day, denizens laughed and squabbled as they lost some treasure and then found it again.  Some people blamed it on the maps, and others blamed the grassy nature of the field, but luckily, Captain Annie was on hand to remove the doubt and point at the booty.

Some men cried with happiness when they discovered their maps had not been upside down, but they had in fact been reading them incorrectly.  A nearby hippy blamed a school for having let his tea get cold, although that was probably a coincidence.

The aforementioned tree hugger scampered towards the café when food was declared, and forgot all about his tea-related problems.

 

Market Mania
As funky stallholders laid out their wares on broad sheets, several denizens hung around to see what was available.  The smelly aromatherapy stuff was very popular, and some of the younger denizens also sold many greetings cards bearing squashed flowers.

In another fruity move, several t-shirts were laid out and some folk could not look away.

Scary Moment
Finally, at the local barbecue evening, denizens looked on in wonder as Shaf and Chris cooked food on hot wire racks.  It would seem that no fingers were scorched, although some onlookers screamed in panic as it appeared that a sausage may have burned.  Upon closer inspection, though, it seems that it was a trick of the light.